Thursday, November 26, 2015

American's have to have their guns

I got shot recently...

On November 1, 2015, in Columbus, Georgia,I was teaching my girlfriend how to handle a gun, but I didn't do a very good job. As I handed her the gun, she pulled the trigger and shot me in the nuts.

On November 1, 2015, in Talledaga, Alabama, one of my family members (I'm not sure which one – my memory's not what it used to be) was showing me a Derringer when he pulled the trigger and shot me in the head. Now I'm dead.

On November 1, 2015, I was driving my car and showing my handgun to two friends. To prove it wasn't loaded, I pointed the gun at my head and pulled the trigger. I don't remember much after that because I turned my brain into mush and now I'm dead.

I was hunting with my uncle on November 2, 2015. Said uncle said he thought I looked like a turkey, so he shot me with his 12-gauge shotgun. It looks like I will live, but there will be a few physical and mental scars.

I was at home on November 2nd, 2015, when my boyfriend came into the apartment. He'd just had an argument with some other guys and fired his gun into the air to scare them, so now he was trying to hide the gun. Like the idiot he is, he accidentally pulled the trigger and shot me in the foot. I will survive, but no more guns in the house – when he gets out of jail.

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